


You and me, baby.

by Fred_ster



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types, Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Hurt Steve, Hurt Steve Rogers, M/M, Married Couple, Protective Tony, Protective Tony Stark, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-12
Updated: 2018-07-12
Packaged: 2019-06-09 13:11:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,568
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15268215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fred_ster/pseuds/Fred_ster
Summary: When Dr. Banner is kidnapped, nobody would think that the ultimate goal is actually to hurt America's hero. Bruce is forced to create an antidote for the serum and when Steve is hurt with hit, everyone's goal is just to kill Iron Man's husband. The Avengers will be put one against one in the hope that America will believe heroes don't exist. Will the power of lvoe overcome the obstacles?Suck at summary, lots of Steve/Tony feels and lots of much needed Steve!Whump and Injured Steve





	1. Chapter 1

The 36 hours Ross gave to Tony to solve the situation with Steve and the others about the Sokovia Accords were gone. Tony has lost, that was his failure, not Iron Man’s, not the Avengers’, his failure. He couldn’t get Steve back – and therefore Falcone -, he couldn’t keep Wanda safe, he wasn’t able to leave Burton outside that discussion and most of all, once again, he didn’t manage to be more than Bucky was, in the eyes of Steve Rogers. That was his own fault, the ONU troops would march against Cap, with the intent of harming, and in the worst scenario, killing, and there was nothing the great Tony Stark could do to prevent it. Tony tried, he tried to convince himself that, if Steve had chosen Bucky over him, that it could deal with the consequences himself, he tried to repeat in his head that all that was going to come, Steve had brought it on himself, but all the words floating in his mind didn’t make any sense. It was not Captain America and the Avengers, that was all about Steve and Tony, the problem there, wasn’t that the great soldier failed the United States of America, the problem was that Steve had left Tony behind, again. Not matter how much Tony tried to be better for Steve, at the end of the day he would still choose Barnes and that was something Tony couldn’t change.

He couldn’t stand the presence of Vision and when the doctors said Rhodes would make a good recovery, with no permanent damages he decided to go away, he wasn’t ready to act smart, make jokes about people in wheel chair with Rhodes and blink to the nurses, neither he wanted to go cry somewhere like a dog, he just needed space. He needed a moment for himself, because no matter how strong his ego was, Tony still felt underestimated and forgotten all the time. Sometimes he started to wonder what if he didn’t have all those money, and therefore his armour, his gadget, his power, he would have been nothing for the Avengers and most of all, for Steve. He usually stopped imaging a world where he was poor after three minutes, his heart couldn’t stand that idea and he didn’t want to risk a stroke. He left the hospital and headed back to the headquarter where Ross was coordinating the “Red Brooklyn” mission, that name was the only thing that went close enough to make Tony smile that day, Ironic how Cap was persecuted, with a mission tilted after another thing he loved more than Tony. Stupid Brooklyn.

Ross was standing in front of something like forty screen, all showing different perspective of the troop going towards the big garage where caught by a camera, with Sam and Barnes, he had his arm crossed, his eyes were focused on the soldiers’ steps, Tony knew al wanted Ross was not to make Steve give up, but to knock him down. Nat was there, she wasn’t defensive as always, she looked surrounded, for once, she couldn’t do anything despite thinking that that was a wrong decision, she was sitting on a chair, not far from Ross, in the corner of the room, where could see everything without listening to people talking about be involved in Captain America’s defeat. When Nat saw Tony, standing on the threshold she firstly looked him in the eyes, they understood each other instantly for they were thinking the exact same thing, they had the power to not let all that happen and they failed. She stood up, but she didn’t move from her spot, while Tony made some weak step touching his head like he had a migraine, his head was about to explode and he just wanted to be in bed, far from that mess. He went standing next to Nat, but with his back leaning on the wall. She was wearing her usual black suit, while he had black trousers and a white shirt, it was unbuttoned and you could see Rhodes’ blood on the sleeves and some cuts on his torso. They just stand there, watching those soldiers advancing towards their Cap, their Steve. Because if there was another person Steve failed by taking Bucky’s sides that was Nat. They knew they couldn’t kill Steve, they knew they could barely harm him, but the fact they were there, powerless and they still had to watch while Steve was bitten, taken and humiliated was still painful.

Nobody had said anything, not Tony, not Nat, not Ross, until the latter turned and watched the two Avengers like he just noticed they were inside the room. He smiled in a way that made Tony wish he could have made all those old teeth fall with a punch and he then turned again, watching the screen again.

“You know, I have never been a fan of science, neither of medicine, not after that heart attack on the golf field… damn meds they wanted to stop working. Today instead, I am grateful, for both be able to still work and for medicine and science.”

Tony knew that wasn’t all Ross had to say, he just wanted to be mysterious, he wanted to appear smart, able to act tactically and strategically, but Tony knew that old man was nothing but wasted words and make people do the dirty job. Nat looked at Tony who was still touching his head. Iron Man would have done anything to not spend another minute with that idiot, he started to ask himself why he had gone there, why, after everything, he still felt like he had to be with Steve, and those were surely more important questions then the one Ross wanted to hear.

“I bet you’re about to tell us the story of love with science and medicine. Please, feel free to start don’t worry if I…. I do it when I sleep, it’s not like a disease or something. “

Ross didn’t look too surprised by the irony in Tony’s voice, he was used to that childish behaviour and anyway he was struggling to hide his happiness and just wanted to tell them something he found great.

“Your lack of sobriety doesn’t surprise me anymore, Stark, therefore I’ll ignore what you say, as everyone should. Nevertheless, you want to keep behaving like this I should inform you that I am not submitted by the fear your power creates anymore. “

Tony was still thinking about everything but what Ross was saying, whereas Nat started to look interested by the old man’s words. Ross stayed silence for some minutes, looking like he was really enjoying that moment. Suddenly, the quiet in the room was wrecked by the sound of the soldiers breaking into the garage, coming through the headphones connected to the screens, Tony couldn’t help look at what was going on, while Nat still had her eyes on Ross, she didn’t want to see that scene. It was then, that the old man turned again so that he could look both Iron Man and Black Widow, his smile was almost cruel for you could see happiness spreading to its whole body thanks to the sound of the doors of the garage opened by the soldiers.

“What does that mean?”

Nat spoke loud, so that her voice could cover the sound coming from the images on the screen, Tony moved his gaze on her, almost like he didn’t understand who talked, he was surprised by the fact that Nat seemed almost scared by Ross’ words, and then the latter talked again.

“Doctor Banner is a beautiful person, many people can’t even remember that the big evil green monster is actually a man, it’s a pity, you know, he is truly kind and… helpful, when encouraged, of course. “

He was enjoying so much, he was loving every minute of that moment and you could see it by the way he was smiling and moving his head to look t both the two Avengers and the soldiers on the screen. They had entered the garage, Steve, Bucky and Sam where laying down, Sam and Bucky had their hands tied behind his back while Steve was free, a soldier point a gun on his head. Tony tried to watch, but he couldn’t, he didn’t know if he was even able to look at that horrible scene without falling to the ground, furthermore he was still waiting for Ross to finish his damn speech. Nat on the other hand started to stress in the minute Ross mentioned Banner, even if she was still trying to hide that.

“It’s been fifty years; still Captain America seems so invincible to everyone. But science evolve, and that serum... well, it’s old school if compared to Banner’s knowledge.”

Tony woke up from the state of quietness in which he was since the beginning and opened his eyes as much as he could to look at Ross with surprise, hunger and disgust.

“Don’t you... “

“If I were you Stark... I wouldn’t make threat and sure as hell I wouldn’t miss this moment: Captain America is finally…defeated. “

Ross changed the direction of his gaze, focusing on what was going on the screen, while the same soldier was keeping the gun on Steve’s head, another one was getting closer with a needle in his hand, Sam was struggling to let himself out from the soldier’s hold while Bucky was on the ground, unconscious knocked down some minutes before by a soldier who Bucky had just hit with a shoulder. Tony was paralyzed, his mouth wide open, his eyes couldn’t believe what they were seeing, Nat made some fast step towards Ross, but was stopped my two men that stood close to the door until that moment, they held her by the arms, her face close to Ross.

“What did you do? “

“I am erasing a problem, Miss Romanov. Let’s just say… you’ll have to find another so called “hero”. Steve Rogers is now just Steve Rogers or.. do you call him Steve Stark? How does it work with gay couple? I’ve always wanted to know. “

After the needle in the screen had been taken out empty from Steve’s arm, Tony jumped across the room, he managed to hit Ross on his cheek before been pushed away by the soldiers that were holding Nat’s arms. Despite being free, Nat didn’t hit Ross as well, she spited on him with hunger radiating in her bright eyes before going close to Tony to help him get up after a soldier had made him fall on the ground.

“Let’s…let’s go, come on. “

Ross started to laugh and both Tony and Nat couldn’t decide that sound was worst that Steve’s groaning, four soldiers where around his body, beating the shit out of him. The two Avengers didn’t do or say anything else before heading to the door, Nat passed in front of Ross without saying anything, he still smiled while cleaning the blood coming from his nose, Tony, on the contrary, stood there, one inch from his face.

“You’ll regret this. “

It was hard to see Ton that serious, it didn’t happen often, it was difficult to trouble his heart in that way, but they touched Steve, they harmed Steve, and Tony had officially lost his mind.


	2. Chapter 2

Ross had no intention on killing Steve Rogers, he didn’t want to have a dead hero, he wanted people to see that he was nothing, he wanted to eliminate their love for the Avengers, they wanted to erase what made the Captain America so great, he wanted to take the serum out of him like he wanted to take Tony’s armour away. He wasn’t going to make them martyrs, he wanted to make them powerless and therefore useless.  
When Tony and Nat arrived at the garage they recognized by the video on the screen back at the headquarter, everyone was still there. Bucky, who had woken up was on Steve’s body, tears falling on Steve’s bruised skin from his cheeks, Sam was punching the wall, screaming. Not far from the three man, another one was laying down, barely breathing and brutally beaten, he was shirtless and blood covered his torso. Nat ran, she didn’t need a closer look, she knew that it was Banner, she could recognize the curly and messy hair she used to touch, she could see his face, no matter how bruised and covered by blood, she would recognize those lips and eyes in a million. Her hands where shaking while she turned his body so that she could see the level of damage his body had suffered. 

 

“Come on… come on... you can’t just disappear for months and show up dead, you need to buy me a drink first. “  
“Or... you... you could buy me one... “  
Banner’s voice was low and rough, but that was Enough for Nat to feel less scared, he was still Banner, and he was still alive. She smiled, more because of her being nervous than for happiness, it was in then moment that something in her head reminded her that Banner wasn’t her only worry. Suddenly, she turned her head jut to see Tony going –after minutes of being paralyzed- close to Steve. He pushed Bucky far from him with a strong push that made the Winter Soldier crush on the ground.

“You stay away from him!”

Nat didn’t move, she knew there was nothing Tony wanted to hear, she knew there was nothing that she could do, Banner leaned on her in search of help to stand up, therefore she put his arm around her neck and helped him stand. The doctor was weak, but once on his feet Nat noticed that all the blood he was covered by, was not just his own. Banner looked at Bucky, sitting on the ground with his hands closed and his face covered in tears. Sam leaning on the wall he had just spent five minutes punching and he was struggling to breath regularly while he watched Steve, they had to stay there watching their friend being beaten again and again, powerless. Banner felt his heart falling into pieces, especially when he caught the expression on Tony’s face.  
Iron Man was sitting on the ground, Steve’s head on his legs. His hands where shaking while he touched Cap’s face, he was almost scared by the possibility to hurt him even more, he wasn’t crying, he’s face was a mix of emotions, his head was about to explode, the faces of the people he blamed for that where images going around his head, his throat was dry and his heartbeat was terribly fast. One of Steve’s cheek was coloured in a dark purple. There was blood coming from his mouth, that had arrived to the end of his neck where the hole made by the needle was still visible and livid. His shirt had holes that showed bruises and cuts, his shoulder was in an unnatural position, there was a huge dark mark on the skin above his ribs. And his left leg seemed broken. Tony couldn’t watch, the more wound he saw the more he lost his breath. He felt something on the hand he had under Steve’s hand, and when he looked he wished he didn’t. Banner closed his eyes. His legs start to shake and Nat had to put more effort to keep him standing. Tony raised his head at the sound of Nat asking Banner if he wanted to sit, he left Steve, leaning his head with care on the ground. He stood, all his eyes could see was Banner, all he could hear was him groaning, him, not Steve, not the wounded dead Steve, no, him. He didn’t even hear Sam’s confused words to the paramedic he was talking to with his phone. There was nothing but Banner in front of him. He started to run, Nat noticed almost immediately, left Banner and went against Tony who hit her with his elbow and pushed her on the ground, Then, he went for Banner, He pushed him too, making him hit the wall, he repeatedly punched him with one hand, while the other kept the doctor standing. Nat and Bucky tried to hold him, but Tony’s body was full of strength and hunger.

“Tony! Tony stop! You’ll kill him. “

Nat’s words were lost in the air; Tony didn’t even hear. Bucky’s hand, on the contrary, was felt instantly by Tony, who turned just to punch him as well while one hand still kept Banner by his neck, him almost choking. 

“You shut your fucking mouth, don’t you talk to me!”

Bucky started to cough, blood covering the floor, coming from his mouth. Once again, Tony focused on Banner. One hand on the wall the other pointed at the Doctor’s face.

“What did you do?”  
“I… I had to... Tony please listen to me... please... “  
“You killed Steve! You killed my husband!”  
“What? Tony I... “

Tony was about to punch him again, when he heard a gun been loaded and something cold pressed on the side of his head. Nat was standing there, her hand almost shaking, her eyes full of hate and sadness.

“That’s enough. “  
“Hope you’re ready to pull that trigger Romanoff. “

Banner, tried to catch his breath, he struggled to speak, but his throat hurt as much as his face. He managed to breath almost regularly and say some words.

“He…he’s not dead. “

Tony froze, he looked at Steve’s body once again, trying to catch a glimpse of life in his body but Steve still looked dead, there was no trace of that positive energy the used to follow still everywhere, there was nothing. He had to be dead, he was dead. Tony didn’t want to hope, he knew it was too dangerous, he knew that if started to hope he wouldn’t be able to stop. 

“What the hell are you saying? Can’t you see him? Look at him! Look! Looks dead to me!”

Banner shake his head, pain covering hi face at every moment he made –or tried to make-. He wanted to explain, he really wanted to, but everything was so complicated he wasn’t sure to be able to speak that much.

“There’s an antidote… Tony.. he’s not dead.. he’s just.. not a super soldier anymore..”

Tony wanted to say something, he wanted to punch him again, he wanted to punch Bucky, he wanted to punch Ross and most of all, he wanted to go back in time and prevent all that, go back in time and be the one Steve choose, instead of Bucky. The sound of the ambulance approaching made everyone turn their hand, just to see blue lights getting closer, it was the last thing Banner Saw, before following Steve and pass out.

“He’ll live, he has to.”

It was the first sound anyone heard after three hours of complete silence. The words came from Bucky’s mouth, the same Bucky who had spent the entire amount of time staring at the white wall in front of him. The ambulance, came from the Avengers base and brought them back there, there were the only doctors Tony trusted, and the only ones who were used to treat Steve. Three hours had passed by without having a news about Steve or Banner, not a single word. The place was completely empty; the majority of people were with Steve trying to figure out something. Banner had managed to wake up and say something more about what was injected in Steve’s neck. Tony had threatened everyone to get information but nobody dared to say anything, for anyone wanted to admit that Captain America was gone, replaced by a heavily injured man with no fast healing capabilities. Sam had been going around, silent. Bucky, Bucky didn’t move an inch of his body, he stayed on the exact same position on the same chair for three hours before saying those words.

“You.. just shut up, ok?”

Tony didn’t even bother look at Bucky while talking, he kept his gaze on the opposite side, waiting to see someone walk through the aisle to inform them about Steve’s condition. Nothing, not even Nat, who stayed with Banner for the whole time, came.

“He’s my friend.”  
“No! No, he’s not your “friend”, he’s my husband! He’s here because of you, he is here because he chose you and this led him to be found and hurt. You are not his friend, you’re his liability, you’re his burden, you’re not his fucking friend!”  
“He could die and you still make this about you not being “chosen”? Grew up. “  
“Do you have a death wish? I can make it quick, you know. “

Tony ironically smiled, finally giving up and looking at Bucky’s face who decided to let go and stop discussing with him, he made himself think clearly and decided that it was the shock talking, not Tony, because there was no way in the word he could be the cause to Steve’s death. Sam wanted to say something, tell them to shut up, that that was enough, that that was not about neither of them, that he didn’t matter whose fault was, what mattered was Steve’s life, but he couldn’t speak.  
Finally, someone arrived, it was that Chinese doctor Tony couldn’t remember the name of, he remembered seeing her making to eye to Thor, but nothing more. He stood up and went closer without saying anything, he just wanted to know something, Bucky and Sam instantly followed.

“Tony…”  
“Speak. “  
“He’s not dead.”

Bucky and Sam looked at each other smiling, no matter how much they hated each other, Steve was too important for both, they hugged, too happy to say anything. Tony, on the other hand, was still there, waiting for more, “alive” wasn’t enough, he needed to know that he was still him, that he could speak and hear, walk and run.

“And? “  
“Tony.. he’s alive, didn’t you hear?”

The female doctor asked that, in a way Tony recognised as nervous, he knew she just wanted him to focus on the good thing to not focus on the rest. Sam and Bucky looked at Tony, their eyes confused by that behaviour. 

“Just tell me, for God’s sake!”  
“Ok.. calm down. He.. he has a fractured skull, dislocated right shoulder, three broken ribs, left leg is fractured in five places. He suffered internal bleeding, a rib punctured his lung, we manage to stabilize it. He’s really weak and he won’t heal Tony. What they injected him with wasn’t poison, it cancelled the effect of the serum. “  
Bucky, Sam and Tony froze. The latter started to take some steps backwords looking at the floor and shaking his head. Sam had a hand on his mouth. Bucky looked at the doctor with wide open eyes, he was the only one who managed to say something.

“Will he go back to his old conditions? Will he… be sick and everything?”  
“No, the serum is still there, but Doctor Banner “cure” is stronger, he doesn’t let the serum work. There’s an antidote, Banner said and we’re going to work on it right away, but it takes time, we’ll need to test it and… “  
“And?”

The doctor wasn’t able to answer Bucky’s question, the panic in his voice made her almost cry, she felt guilty and coward for not looking him in the eyes, she didn’t want to compare her pain to their, but that situation was hard for everyone.  
“.. and keep Steve alive.”

It was Tony to speak for her, he was still behind them all, his gaze still on the floor. Steve, his Steve. Tony felt like he was going to explode, his head was unable to process all the information, he needed to sit and he needed to run, to cry and to scream, he felt so much that he didn’t know how he was supposed to feel.

“Tony. “  
“Not now. “  
“Tony he... “  
“Do not talk to me, do not tell me he’s going to be fine. Thank you for the information doctor but please, shut up, I have heard enough, ok? Can you… can you please just shut up? “  
“He asked for you! He woke up before we anesthetized him and he said your name. I thought you might have wanted to know.”  
“I.. need some air. “

It was the last thing Tony said before turning and heading to the door, Sm and Bucky stood there watching the man go, powerless. 

“Tony.. wait.. “

But it was to late, Tony was gone.  
The fresh air of the night hit Tony’s face in the minute he stepped outside, he had hoped that could help his head, stopping it from spinning, but nothing happened, on the contrary, after less than one minutes, Tony found himself throwing up on the green grass outside the building, his eyes filled with tears. When he was finished, he stood up slowly worried about the dizziness he started to feel. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath and for a moment he was the man watching his watch, unable to stop moving, while he waited for the man he loved, he was the man with the shaking hands that struggled to put a ring in his now-husband’s finger, he was the one asleep at midnight the night of the wedding and he was the one taking photo of Steve like a stalker during their honey moon, all the shit that happened where just a bad nightmare, they were fine and they were happy. But when he opened his eyes and saw nothing but darkness in front of him he remembered, he remembered everything and felt the nausea again. He decided to go home, even if without Steve it was nothing but a big mansion, he decided to go, despite knowing that that place full of Steve’s thing would have killed him, he decided to go, because he decided to be a coward, he decided to go because he couldn’t stand the sight of Steve in that bed, not now, not ever.

After spending one hour talking about the ideas he had for new wings made of steel, to feel like Superman, Sam left Steve’s room and went sleeping in a room, the infirmary provided him. Bucky waited 45 minutes before truly entering the room, he stood at the entrance unable to move for almost twenty minutes before going to sit next to the bed where still was laying down, his body was more clean than before, but still looked wrecked, you could see his muscles under the heavy blanket on him, his trained torso going up and down with his breath. Bucky kept Steve’s hand between his own, and smiled looking at his best friend’s face.

“Tony think you chose me, you know. No matter how many rings you put on that son of a bitch’s finger, he will still see me as a threat to your fairy tale.”

Bucky laughed, in his head he heard wat Steve would have said in that moment, something like “Buck” Language” He’s still my husband you know?” in a strong Brooklyn accent. He shook his head, still smiling before leaning with his forehead on Steve’s hand. 

“Steve.. we lost each other so many times I.. “

“.. never..”

 

Bucky froze, he moved his gaze up, just to find Steve’s eyes blinking repeatedly, his tongue tried to do something about the dryness on his lips while he weakly held to Bucky’s hand. The Winter Soldier let a tear fall from his eye, because for once, he hadn’t been sure he would have seen those blue eyes again, he smiled and laughed, and took some minutes to realize that that word came from Steve’s mouth.  
“What? What did you say? You talked.. you.. talked..”  
“Yes.”

Steve was struggling to speak but Bucky was happy enough, he didn’t need speeches and long sentences, Steve was alive, Steve spoke and Steve recognized him, he didn’t need anything else. Bucky stood up, still smiling and looking at Steve’s face, he was obviously really tired and probably in pain, but he looked almost relaxed, there was almost a smile on his face, something Bucky didn’t need, he knew that was his Steve. 

“I’ll go call someone, you stay there, don’t move, I’ll come back and… “  
“Tony…”

Bucky stopped smiling, he bite is lip and looked down at the floor, trying to find whatever explanation could save him from that moment, because there was no way he would say Tony abandoned him, there was no way he would break his heart when he just woke up. He took a deep breath and nodded with a fake smile on his pale face.

“I’ll call him too. He’s with Sam.”

He went outside, and instantly looked for a nurse to whom he said that Steve was awake, she then told him that the doctor would have been with him in a minute and disappeared, he then went looking for Sam. When he found out in which room he was sleeping, he didn’t even bother knock the door, and just entered talking loudly.

“Wake up.. Steve’s awake, he wants Tony, I’ll find him. You keep him busy and tell Nat. “

He looked like he was back to the man with no feelings, he spoke like he gave instructions for a mission. The truth was Bucky was feeling so much anger at the moment he wasn’t able to focus on anything if not Tony and his fucking childish behaviour.  
The big house felt empty like never before, everything was there, intact, it almost seemed like a normal day if you looked inside. There were still the boxes of the food Tony had delivered home the night before, after Steve was gone. There was smell of coffee in the kitchen, the trash bin was empty, it was Steve who always made sure of that, Tony’s mug was still on the wooden table in the middle of the dining room, the fake fire place Steve had always hated was switched off, the blanket they used to bring on the couch whey they watched the television was still there. At the sight of all those things, Tony felt his heart fall for a thousand miles, he wasn’t really attached to those objects. If a glass fell, Tony didn’t really care he could always buy another, Steve on the other hand had always been really overwhelmed by all the money they had and all the things they owned, those small stupid objects where, in Steve’s opinion what made their daily routine, their life together, Tony never understood that, he always thought Cap was a bit too romantic, but when he saw all the things they used to leave behind when going to work, he understood. He didn’t really stop looking around, he kept walking through the house, heading to the master bedroom. Going where they used to sleep was even worst, Tony knew before doing it, but it couldn’t help, he needed to see, he needed to try to escape for just one minute. It was the only room Tony let Steve decorate, it was him that chose the furniture, the colour and everything, Tony had described the result as “a farm-boy dream bedroom”, but deep inside he loved how all the things in there made him think about Steve and maybe, that was the reason why Tony wanted to be there in that moment, he was hoping he could feel like Steve was still in there. Nothing happened. All the memories that hit Tony’s face when he entered, made him feel dizzy and incredibly sad. The photo of their wedding, the thousands pillows Tony slept with close to the one Steve used, his husband’s t-shirt on the chair where Tony always told him not to leave anything “There is a five thousand dollars’ closet, you could use it sometimes”, he used to say, but despite waking up so early, Steve was always late and he always forgot to put his clothes in their place. Tony smiled thinking about it, he remembered all the morning they spent together, he remembered how Steve would stay in bed for hours after waking up, so that Tony would find him once his alarm went on, he remembered how Steve refused to let Friday prepare his coffee every morning. Tony had to lean to the door, he was so sad, tears started to fill his dark eyes, and so angry he was about to break the door. He took a deep breath and went in the closet. It was Steve’s idea to have a shared closet, each of them had a different side of it, but Steve loved to see Tony dress up, he loved to see how he chose his suit and tied his tie, he loved to button his shirt just to have an excuse to kiss him. Tony went close to Steve’s side, he moved his shaking hand to Steve’s jacket and hoodie and took one, it was one of Steve’s favourite, a grey hoodie, the fabric inside was warm, Steve usually put that one when he went running really early in the morning, he used to throw it to the ground in the bathroom before taking a shower and going back to bed with Tony. Tony held the hoodie a put is face on it, Steve’s smell was still there, and for a moment, Steve too was there and everything was perfect. Tony would have stayed there for hours, but a tedious noise interrupted him, he could hear some steps not far from him but he didn’t worry, if Friday hadn’t notified him it meant it was someone he knew, and indeed, it was. Tony take his shirt off and put Steve’s hoodie on before heading back to the bedroom just to find Bucky Barnes on the threshold.

“You got to be kidding me.”  
“He’s awake.”

Tony froze, he looked Bucky in the eyes without saying anything, for it was one of those rare occasions in which Tony Stark didn’t know what to say, he wasn’t surprised. He knew Steve was a stubborn son of a bitch and he would have woken up, he just wasn’t ready to see him.

“Ok. “ Was the only thing he managed to say.  
“Ok? Seriously? Is that all you’ve got to say? Your husband woke up after hours of fighting for his life and you just say “ok”?”  
“I can’t see him now, alright? And it’s not even your business so why don’t you just go back doing whatever is that you do in you free time?”  
“You can’t see him?”  
“Can you stop repeating everything I say? You’re becoming more irritating than usual. “  
“This is not about you! This about Steve.”  
“Ok, you know what? You...”  
“No, shut up, you shut that fucking mouth. Steve is there, asking for you, he is there and the only thing he wants, the only person he needs to see, is you. Did he hurt your pride? Well, I’m sorry, he’ll have to make it up to you when he gets better and Steve... Steve will get better, I know it and you should know it too.”  
“You finished?”  
“Oh my God, just stop! Stop doing this Tony, can’t you see what are you doing? HE DIDN’T FUCKING CHOSE ME. Ok? He didn’t, he never did, there was a time I wanted him to, there was a time he would have done it, but that time is gone, is past. I don’t fucking want to be here, I don’t fucking have to tell you that all this is bullshit and if you don’t start acting like an adult you will regret it. Steve loves you but he loves justice too, he believed me over the world, and he did what he thought was right, he didn’t do this against you, he did it for me so stop making this about yourself, stand up and bring your ass there or I’ll do it for you. “

Tony wanted to say something, he really did, something in Tony Stark style, but there was nothing wrong with what Bucky had say, Tony knew it. He had to be there for Steve like Steve was there for Tony every time Tony needed – or not-, he had to be there for his husband, because he needed him to know that “for better and for worst” had a meaning for him too. Tony took a deep breath and nodded, that was all he could do to show someone that he agreed, he wasn’t able to admit he was wrong, he wasn’t able to say “Yes, you’re right”. Bucky knew it and without a moment of hesitation he headed to the door, Tony took some of Steve’s stuff and did the same short after him. He wanted to see Steve, he needed to see Steve.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's the shortest of all chapters, sorry about that xx

When they arrived, Steve was asleep in his bed, Sam sitting next to him was reading “Captain America, a bibliography” out loud, making jokes about it, occasionally Steve would wake up, hear something, laugh and go back to sleep. Nat was watching them by the glass outside the room, she had spent the entire day with Banner, trying to convince him, none of that was his fault. Turned out, Ross had not just tortured him but also threatened each of the Avengers, Banner had resisted for a bit, but when he heard the name of Natasha, the pain and the fear were too much and he gave up, the only thing he was able to do, was to create something able to weaken the serum rather than neutralize it, he knew al Ross wanted was to see a vulnerable Captain America, and he decided to make him happy in his own way. He wanted to explain it to Tony, he didn’t care how much punched he would have received, he needed Tony to now he didn’t betray any of them, especially not on his own choice, but Nat knew Tony and Banner, the former wouldn’t have wanted to listen to anything the doctor had to say, the latter wasn’t able to think clearly, he had a good heart and he didn’t really know what he was talking about, this is why Nat waited for him to be sedated before leaving his room. She talked to Cho, the Chinese doctor who had talked to Tony who informed her about Cap’s condition. She didn’t spend too much time with him, she just left a fast kiss on his forehead after making sure nobody was watching and she left short after that.  
“Enjoying the view? Must be proud of your boyfriend.”  
Natasha didn’t even bother turn her head, she knew that voice, she knew that sarcasm, she knew how offensive and heartless Tony could get when there something wrong with Steve, and this is why she decided to ignore him. Instead, she knocked at the glass, when Sam heard he looked at het who made him understand he had to leave Steve. Sam started to say goodbye while Nat finally gave Tony some attention and looked at him.

“Nothing? No words? Oh well, I guess be the girlfriend of Captain America’s killer must be shameful. I get that. “

Bucky shake his head, after all that time, he still couldn’t believe Tony could act in that way sometimes, he really looked like a child and he was able to unnerve everyone one, too bad Natasha had been called worse. She raised her hand, to make Bucky understand it was alright and looked and Tony with her eyes full of love.

“You should go. “

Sam stepped outside the room, he barely looked at the group of people standing in front of the door, he just whispered that he needed a coffee, but you could hear that he was about to cry, Nat put her hand on his shoulder for a second, before seeing him walk fast towards the bathroom. Tony ignored him and started to take some steps, while Nat and Bucky went away, not wanting to disturb them. Steve looked in a certain way worse than the last time Tony saw him, his face was sweated, and he was obviously in pain, her shoulder was wrapped with if arm and his leg was attached to a bandage coming from the wall to keep it up. Tony’s steps were slow while he headed to the chair next to the bed, almost like he was scared Steve would wake up, he wasn’t sure he could handle a conversation in that moment, too bad Steve chose to open his eyes in that moment.

"You’re here. “ Steve whispered, in a way Tony could barely hear, but he did. He didn’t look Steve, he kept his gaze on the ground, he couldn’t look at him, he just couldn’t.  
“Looks like I am. “  
“Tony...”  
There was a moment of silence, Tony tried, he really tried to raise his head, but something was holding him. Fear, maybe, Tony didn’t know.  
“Tony... look at me. “  
And Tony did, because Steve’s wasn’t asking, he was begging.  
“Tony. “  
“Steve. “  
“Come here… please. “ 

Tony made some more steps, before arriving next to the bed and sit. He took a deep breath, almost like he was preparing himself for what came next and then he looked at Steve whose hand was waiting for Tony’s. Iron Man, forced himself to focus on his husband needs, he needed to be strong, and he wasn’t sure he could be, he was never the strong one in the couple, he was the nervous one, he was the one who needed Steve and he never felt like he was needed back in the same way, but here, in that moment, he knew Steve needed him. He unsuccessfully tried to smile, before giving up and hold Steve’s hand. 

“So… here we are. “  
“You’re angry. “  
“I am not. “  
“You are. “  
“Steve… “  
“It’s ok, it’s fine. “  
“No! No Steve, this is not ok. You… “  
Here he was, making it all about himself, again, letting his hunger come up to bite Steve. Toy hated himself, he stopped holding Steve’s had hand he touched his eyes sighing.  
“Sorry. I’m just.. sorry. “  
“Tony please.. I’m fine. “  
“Stop! Stop Steve, for God’s Sake, stop, please!”  
Tony raised his voice and stood up, all he felt finally making him react to the shit that destroyed their life in one day. He started to walk around the room touching his head and sighing.  
“You are not fine Steve, you’re hurt and you won’t heal. I was there Steve, I saw them doing this to you and I couldn’t do anything because you walked away, you left and I couldn’t save you!”  
“You couldn’t have saved me anyway. “  
“But Bucky could, right? “  
“Tony… come on. “  
“No… no, you… went to him, you left me to save him and that brought you here!”  
“I brought myself here. “  
“FOR HIM!”  
“Tony, please, just listen to me for one damned second!”

Steve raised his voice in a way his ribs didn’t like, especially because in doing that he tried to lift himself a bit up, which resulted in him squeezing his eyes and struggling to catch his breath again. Tony looked at him, once again feeling guilty, he had promised himself to not start that discussion in that moment and still he couldn’t help but do it. He sighed and looked at Steve without moving an inch of his body, he shook his head and lowered his head.

“I should go. “  
Tony said, hunger and sadness clear in his voice.  
“You should stay. “ 

Steve answered with pain and love marking his whispering. Tony took a deep breath, he looked at Steve for one minute which always helped him go through hard moments like that one, and finally went sitting again. Steve forced his husband to hold his hand and smiled at him.

“In my life I always did the right Tony, everything I did, I did it because it was right to do it, Bucky didn’t do anything, help him was the right thing to do, I didn’t do it because I love him and not you, I didn’t do it to hurt you, I did it because it was right, that’s it. Just once I did something because I wanted to and not just because it was right and that was marrying you, so please trust me when I tell you that this has nothing to do with Bucky. “

Tony struggled to look Steve in the eyes, on one hand because he couldn’t stand the look of his husband comforting him when it should have been the contrary, on the other hand because he could fear tears coming to fill his dark brown eyes. At the end, he gave up and looked Steve in the eyes, he then left a long kiss on Steve’s hand before nodding. 

“I just.. look at you Steve. “  
“I’ll be fine. We’ll be ok. “  
“I’ll find a solution Steve, I promise you, I will. “  
“I know, I know you will, but do it tomorrow ok? Now just, just stay here, with me. “  
Nobody said anything more, there was no need to do it. Tony laid in bed with Steve, he didn’t really sleep much, he just looked at Steve sleeping while controlling his breath. His world was in that bed and he had no intention on losing it.


End file.
